The first step to your relationship care routine is
reflecting on your past within the relationship and your intentions that started the whole journey. For all that has happened through the years for better or worse there was a reason for the reason for the ideas for the dream for the excitement and somewhere inside there is clarity to make sense of it all again.
There is absolutely no reason to think that bring clarity, joy, and satisfaction back into your relationship is going to take time that you do not have or that you will have to overwhelm your already busy schedule with ways to woo your partner.
Often times people add to the stress, fights, and finger pointing because they make unachievable plans backed with a false intention that if they execute this date night or counseling session their relationship will be fixed.
No one has the time for that.
And it can potentially make the experience even worse while internally validating on even the tiniest level that it can’t be fixed.
Nothing of any value is going to happen before your set your mindset and intention of how you want to be in this relationship to your partner. When you first met you held each other in complete potential and excitement and your actions plus language reflected your mindset; not only for and towards your partner but also in how you projected yourself and how people took in the vision of the two of you.
Times passes, greatness happens, challenges conquered, pain soothed, celebrations, and memories made. Lots of things to embrace…. yet none of those memories and events I just mentioned are what make up day to day life and the quality of the experience you feel inside.
What you fill inside are the gaps, the lack of satisfaction day to day. For some reason not feeling the momentum and purpose for everything. Maybe there is a distance in your relationship now or maybe you are so time exhausted you hardly have time for your relationship. You are going through the motion and created success each day yet the success becomes accomplishing the tasks each day and planning the events. You start to feel hollow inside and that space inside grows. It can grow until you don’t feel the joy in the actions anymore and you just simply aren’t happy. And you think it's this relationship or your partner, maybe you exactly know the moment the loneliness began, yet what do you do about it...
You reset your relationship mindset.
You create your relationship self care plan.
You reinvent a relationship intention that benefits the level you are at now in your relationship.
You build new habits and patterns with in the actions you are already doing each day starting with simple communication.
And always building a personalized foundation of growth that supports you both first as individuals and then as a couple.
If you would like to read more here is another blog thought for you to explore..
-Dr. Nelson CSC PhD
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